Interview

So, I decided to ring in 2009 by participating in this interview. I found out about it over at Somi. If you have never checked out her blog I highly suggest that you head on over. Nilsa covers a little bit of everything from BlogSecret to just recently getting married and she is one of those bloggers that you will find there almost every weekday. I love that! To participate in this interview there are the following rules:

1. If you want to participate, leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.” (And your e-mail address, please.)
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Not too difficult, yes? So, Somi asked me the following questions.

1.) Name only one blogger you really respect and tell me why. I believe that the blogging world is similar to a collection of friends. In circles of friends there are typically different people who you would consult with on various things or for various reasons. Most recently I have huge admiration for this blog and journey. I truly admire boho girl's open heart, candor, and truth. Most recently she and her husband have adopted a lovely baby named Cedar. If you do not know the story of their adoption it is truly an incredible journey filled to the brim with amazing people. Her experiences remind me that often the road to what we long for is bumpy and drawn out, but that persistence, hope, and faith carry us through.

2.) If you had to pick a non-urban, U.S. destination in which to vacation for a week, where would you go? I would go anywhere that there were mountains, a small quaint downtown, and a lake. I can think of many places that I have been that fit this description, but I want to go somewhere new. Any suggestions that fall into this criteria???

3.) If you had $500 to spend on housing, food and entertainment for the trip mentioned in (2), how would you spend it? I would spend the majority of my money renting a small house where I could walk out my door and go on long hikes with my superpup. The remainder of my money I would spend on purchasing groceries. I love spending hours preparing a meal or making a new recipe when time is not a factor. The great thing about the mountains is that I barely need money for entertainment as I can be entertained by outdoor activites for free.

4.) Tell me about one person with whom you've lost touch. If you hope for a reunion, how would you like that reunion to take place? I was a United States Peace Corps Volunteer from September 2002 through November 2004 in Zambia. There were about 24 others that were apart of my group. I keep up with some of my fellow volunteers by phone, e-mail, or facebook, but one of my closer friends, Christina and I have completely lost touch. A bunch of us were together for New Years Eve in NYC to ring in 2005 and that was the last time that I have seen or talked to her. I would love to reunite with her. From a friendship that began in the bush of Africa we really would not need much entertainment. I would be all for a comfortable evening with no time constraints to sit outside, drink wine, and talk until there is nothing left but a comfortable silence.

5.) In 2008, what was your biggest achievement and your biggest failure/disappointment? I am going to take the liberty of beginning with the biggest disappointment first and then end on an up note here. Without a doubt the biggest disappointment of 2008 was the end of a long-term relationship with a man that I truly adored, the cancellation of our engagement, and the selling of our house. My biggest achievement in 2008 was the undercovering of a new path for myself which will include an extended trip to Europe, graduate school, and a new career path in 2009.

Well, that is it for the questions I was asked. Like I said if you are interested in participating leave a comment with your e-mail address. Happy New Year everyone!

Tagged

My creativity is a bit suppressed at the moment so this is what I have for you...

4 jobs I've had:
1) Live in nanny for 4 kids (for 3 summers)
2) Server in a cafeteria line (first job)
3) United States Peace Corps Volunteer Zambia Africa
4) Sales Representative (in both the furniture & office supply industry)

4 movies I've watched more than once:
1) Dirty Racing
2) St. Elmos Fire
3) Steal Magnolias
4) Crash

4 places I've lived:
1) New Orleans, LA
2) Zambia, Africa
3) NY, NY
4) Boone, NC

4 tv shows I watch:
1) Army Wives
2) The Riches
3) Weeds
4) In Treatment

4 places I've been:
1) Zanibar, Tanzania
2) Santa Fe, New Mexico
3) Seattle, WA
4) Vancouver, Canada

4 people who email me regularly:
1) Anyone from Obama's campaign
2) Members of the train preparing for the NYC trip
3) Pottery Barn
4) Pier 1

4 of my favorite foods:
1) Rocky Road Ice Cream
2) Chicago Style Pizza
3) Crawlfish
4) Oysters

4 places I would like to visit:
1) Capetown
2) Morocco
3) Arizona
4) New Zealand

4 things I'm looking forward to in the coming year:
1) Going to Costa Rica
2) Girls trip to NYC for my 30th birthday
3) Selling my house
4) Moving into a new place

4 friends I'm tagging:
anyone who thinks it would be fun

Give Me Christmas

The mentality of "to whom much is given, much is expected" is a social expectation within the rural villages of Zambia. It is not surprising for someone who you do not know to ask for money, salt, sugar, etc. In the event, that you are in the midst of eating dinner or even preparing it no matter how much you have you are expected to invite the individual who dropped by to join you. This bit of background moves me closer to my point. Around the holidays, I could go into town and people who did not even know me would yell, "Give me Christmas". The mere fact that I was white made people assume that I was rich and in all honesty they were right by comparison.

Over the holidays I often think of people saying to me, "Give me Christmas". In Zambia, something as small as a piece of candy would have made them feel like I had given them Christmas. I love the holidays. I enjoy decorating, entertaining, finding that perfect gift for each person on my list, baking, singing Christmas carols, watching Christmas shows and movies, etc. However, if I didn't have any of that then what would make me feel like I experienced Christmas? You hear stories each year of people seeking the meaning or the spirit of Christmas if you will. I think that we often spend so much time searching for things that we had with us all along.

To me Christmas is about people, promise, and hope. It is about a baby born in less than regal surroundings who is "the annointed one". Even when I spent Christmas thousands of miles away, it was people who made that day special, the birth of a Savior made it significant. This holiday season I encourage you not to become overwhelmed by all there is to do or what you think is expected. Enjoy the moment. What is it going to take for you to feel like you have been given Christmas this year?

Ba Dan

It seems like yesterday that I stepped off the bus to return to my village, of Kafunda, in the Central part of Zambia. I had been in the northern part of the country attending a traditional ceremony. I was elated to return to the place which I called home. When I got off the bus I noticed the local witchdoctor and I walked over to greet him. He was known for his selling of African potatoes by the roadside. Beside his stacks of African potatoes were signs that said, "African potatoes for HIV/AIDS." I talked with the witchdoctor a bit before he made a statement that would wrench the very life from me, "I am sorry to hear about your friend, Ba Dan." As soon as he said this I knew what he meant, but I decided to protest the truth. Not my Ba Dan, not yet. Pretending as if I didn't understand I said, what do you mean? At that point the witch doctor said, Ba Dan passed away 3 days ago. The funeral was yesterday. I knew that hearing the truth aloud was more than I could handle.

I knew that I must leave immediately and go directly to Ba Dan's home. I was sure that the mourners would still be gathered. With my backpack strapped across my back I crossed the road and started down the hill to Ba Dan's house. I have never been overtaken with grief in the way that I was that day. I was sobbing and I finally had to stop as I was sure I would vomit. Instead I ended up doubled over dry heaving. I was sobbing those cries which have moments of high pitched shrills and then silence as you try to catch your breath. Someone must have heard my high pitched shrills as they came to accompany me to Ba Dan's house. The ironic thing is I remember that despite my devastation I had enough sense about me to know that I should stop and get my sarong out of my bag for this moment. Pants wouldn't have been appropriate.

As soon as I was in ear shot of his home the mourning could be heard. As I came closer they became louder and louder. Men and women sit separately to mourn yet in the same vicinity. The women are known for these gut trenching cries that can sometimes be heard in the next village. When I first heard this type of mourning I thought it was a bit put on, however as time passed I realized that it was actually very therapeutic. The harsh realities of life in African villages don't allow much time for sorrow and grief. There are crops to plant, clothes to wash, water to carry, places to weed, etc. They only have those very few days surrounding a funeral to mourn. If they choose otherwise they would not survive.

Upon my arrival I took my rightful place among the mourners and began to sob. There was something very freeing about this type of mourning. There was no one there telling me that I need to try to keep it together. I now detest funerals here where people tell me to try to keep myself together. What is so wrong with sadness and loss and why do we have such a hard time allowing people to feel those emotions? My time crying in junction with everyone else who could understand how I felt was exactly what I needed. The part that was a bit of an adjustment was following because everyone seemed to move on as nothing had happened, but I came to understand later that moving on as if nothing had happened was the only option in order to survive.

You may wonder where the joy and celebration are within this story. That came for me a few months later. His sister in law was pregnant and she gave birth about a month and half after Ba Dan's death. The birth happened in her very home surrounded by a circle of women huddled around her on the dirt floor. Something about that seems so fitting to me. I was fortunate enough to have been apart of that circle. After hours of labor, Bana Mumbi gave birth. Following the baby's birth was one of the longest silences I have ever experienced. With tears in my eyes I anxiously awaited the first cries knowing that if the baby didn't cry there was no medical assistance waiting on the sidelines. Finally he cried and as he did the women screamed with joy that Ba Dan had returned. What an incredible part of the circle of life that I was honored to be apart of.

Now you might be wondering what made me tell this story today. I told this story today because yesterday was World AIDS Day. AIDS is ravaging the continent of Africa and I personally saw the impact that it is having in Zambia. Although as far as I know there was no test that was done to prove this I know that Ba Dan died of AIDS. I personally witnessed the sores that he had that just wouldn't heal, how he continued to become thinner by the day, how his weakness left the manual labor all to his wife. It seems that it was pneumonia that finalized his fate.

AIDS is real. There is a saying that says if you're not infected then you have been affected. Many think that the answers are simple, but I promise that the problem is much larger than it seems. I don't know the solution although I have been pondering it for years. I read an article on MSN yesterday about the AIDS epidemic in Zambia. There was a place where people could comment and one person said, "These children are of no use to anyone (speaking in regards to AIDS orphans). There are too many mouths to feed already. God has his plans. We should let God's plans play out, and help America first." I can not understand this mentality. Who says things like, "these children are of no use to anyone"? What I do know is that these are individuals that need compassion imparted on them just like everyone else.

Global Awareness

This evening I watched the movie, "Blood Diamond". By the end of the movie, I found myself in tears. For many who know me this may come as a surprise because the number of times that others have seen me cry is few and far between. I took a moment to consider what about the movie had gotten me so upset and I came to the realization that it was several things.

The movie was set in Sierra Leone, Africa. Just the images of the landscape gave me this longing feeling in the pit of my stomach. Do you know the feeling that I am talking about where you feel so greatly connected and apart of a place or group of people that when you are far away and you see photos you just have this intense desire to be there again?

I was in the Peace Corps in Africa from 2002 to 2004. This was a life altering experience which I may touch on further in a different post. At that time in my life, I felt much more in tune to what was happening across the globe. The longer that I am back in America the more I find myself caught up in my day to day comings and goings and the less I find myself focusing on what I think of as real issues. I have become more concerned with what new furnishings I want for my house, what new articles of clothing I want at Anthropologie, where are the hip places in town for food or drinks, and what are the best movies out at the moment. The real problem with this evolution is that it seems to all revolve around me.

Some may ponder what is wrong with such an existence. The issue is that this is not who I think that I am or at least who I want to be. I believe that I have a higher purpose which is not me centric. I remember shortly after I returned from Zambia the tsunami occured. I was outraged by the American media's response to the tsunami. The news went something like this: There has been a tsunami of disastrous proportions, now on to your local news. I felt like that the media was relatively dismissive of this natural disaster until reports began regarding the number of Americans who were there on vacation. Correct me if I am wrong, but we are apart of the human race and what happens to one of us affects us all.

So, enough of my soapbox today. I guess my point is that I find myself being less globally aware than I previously felt that I was and that is my own fault. "Blood Diamond" reminded me that I need to be more globally aware. There are over 200,000 children who are soliders in Africa, the Aparatheid ended only 13 years ago, people are hungry, dying of AIDS, and I believe that my purpose is to react. I'm not sure how, but I will continue to look along my journey for the answers to reveal themselves.